I’m not referring to medically assisted suicide. That is an entire different issue. What I am talking about is if someone commits suicide using medication that was prescribed to you. If you willingly gave it to them or they took it from you. If they left behind a suicide note explaining their reasons for taking their life and you are one of them.

This is my opinion. The decision to take your own life is one only you make. Some people call suicide selfish. There are those in Society that ask why didn’t that person think about the loved ones they would be leaving behind? The truth is most of them are thinking about their own pain or how much of a burden they are to their loved ones. They are ill. When you are caught up in your illness you are not thinking clearly.

The media published someone’s suicide note not long ago. This made me furious. This was a private communication that wasn’t supposed to be seen by the public. It was heavy subject matter and heartbreaking. I read it before realizing what it was I was reading. I now wish I hadn’t. The person who committed suicide has a family that is now looking to blame someone and has brought a lawsuit against the woman’s ex-boyfriend. His name was on the prescription bottles and mentioned in the note.

The real problem is that she had these issues before. This wasn’t new behavior. There is no living person to blame. She chose to take her life because she was in unbearable pain. The kind of pain most of Society knows nothing about. The kind of pain that gnaws at you 24 hours a day and never stops. The kind of pain where you feel like there’s a hole in the middle of your chest, a giant aching hole. The kind of pain where you scream and cry into a towel or a pillow so no one can hear you until you fall asleep. The kind of pain that makes your hands feel numb or tingle and there’s a static in your brain, you find yourself rocking back and forth for long periods of time with tears streaming down your face. The kind of pain no one understands or wants to really talk about.

This could be me.

The above story is true. Jim Carrey is going through it right now. I wish him the best of luck. Two troubled people fell in love. One is dead by her own actions and decisions. It is incredibly sad but there is no blame here.

About darie73

I have lived with Bipolar Disorder since my early teens. I have lived with Social Anxiety Disorder for even longer. I self-medicated with alcohol for over 20 years, that's how long it took to get a diagnosis. I'm open and honest about my mental health so hopefully one day the system will change. View all posts by darie73

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