What Your Hair Stylist Wants You To Know~ From a Former Client And Hair Stylist

I have had every hair color ever made. This is partially due to the fact I thought I could disguise myself and also I thought with each new color I would magically look 100 pounds thinner. It never happened.

In my mid thirties I decided to go to Hair School or Cosmetology School. I’m not sure if it’s the same everywhere but in my State the Schools barely teach you anything. I was lucky enough to have a Hair Stylist at the time who had trained in New York. She was willing to help train me.

I have to say I thought going in that I had a vast knowledge of hair and make up. I was disappointed to learn that I was ahead of the school.


In the Salon Industry most stylists do not understand the importance of a good shampoo. In school it isn’t emphasized either. My Hair Guru was kicked off the board of Advisors for telling them the exact same thing. She chastised them for spending 3 months on something salons didn’t do anymore but 1 day on how to shampoo a client and get them to relax.

Making a client relax and feel comfortable is key in this industry. They won’t come back if you don’t.

I would go from salon to salon all over the state because every single Hair Stylist insisted on slapping some gel on my head and saying goodbye. I would leave with wet hair because no one wanted to even attempt to blow dry my frizzy, curly, hair.

I could never feel any of their fingers reach my scalp except for one guy who stood over me and shampooed like a jackhammer. I thought the Double D breasts I had at the time were going to give me black eyes. He didn’t like women so I’m not sure what his reasoning was. His female clients loved it. I felt weird. Probably because I didn’t like to feel like a bowl of Jello.

I learned to shampoo with effectiveness and to massage at the same time from my tutor.


If there is one thing I hate it’s when I do someone’s hair, it’s shiny and beautiful, 6 weeks later they get antsy and go to the local drugstore and buy hair color. They then ruin the beautiful job I did. Then I get a phone call asking if I can fix what they just screwed up.

Store color is harsher on your hair and doesn’t cover grey/white hair as well or as long as professional color. I don’t care what magazine you read. I’ve been coloring my hair since I was 14. I’ve used every brand there is in stores and in most salons. My favorite is from an Australian Company that I can’t get easily so I settle for another one. The store color blows out your cuticle turning it to mush and that is why you think it feels softer.


You do not have to wash your hair every day. Once every third day is the ideal time period if you want your color to last. I have red hair so this is what I do. I hate when odors or too much oil is in my hair so I use Dry Shampoo that does not leave a white residue. The second day is the best. I can make it look rocked out until my dad or sister sees me and tells me to tame it down I’m not in a Whitesnake video.


Try to keep your hair up in a towel for as long as you can. Do your make up first applying moisturizer in an upwards motion on the neck and from the middle out when it comes to your cheeks and smile lines. I am shocked at the amount of people that do not know this.

Using a wide tooth comb meant for wet hair comb your hair out. I usually apply my blow dry lotion/oil first because it makes it easier.

Blow dry your hair at least 75 to 80% with your fingers before tackling with a brush to style. If you don’t you are just causing needless damage with all of the pulling and tugging. If you are going for a straighter style I would use a boar/porcupine bristle round brush. Always use the concentrator! Mine is taped on with electrical tape.

This tool allows you to direct the heat where you want it. At the end of straightening a section hit with the cool shot button to close the cuticle and add shined. When you finish blow drying the entire head put the blow dryer on cool and lock in your style and shine this way.


Please try not to cut your own bangs. If you do, do not cut straight across. Chip into them at an angle. You really need good sharp scissors or you create damage.

I never knew what a great hair cut was until I had a dry hair cut perfected by John Sahag. This is what my tutor mastered in and who she learned from. I used to love watching her work. She would perform on a stage in front of hundreds of people. She would move like a snake dancing around the chair, scissors flying so fast you couldn’t see them.

It was always an honor to have my hair cut by her. I cut it myself now and I do it dry like her. I’m no where near as good I just fake it.

The idea of cutting hair when it is dry and flat ironed is you can see the direction it grows. You then cut the hair in that direction. This works well for people with cow licks and curly hair. The hair also doesn’t grow out it grows in.


Show up to your appointment on time. Your hair should be fairly clean. If you think anyone in your household has lice, please cancel your appointment. Treat everyone in the salon with respect whether they mop the floor or bring you coffee. They are not your personal servants, they are in training. I was surprised to see how some were treated by customers and actually a little disgusted. We’re all human. And last but not least, RELAX!



About darie73

I have lived with Bipolar Disorder since my early teens. I have lived with Social Anxiety Disorder for even longer. I self-medicated with alcohol for over 20 years, that's how long it took to get a diagnosis. I'm open and honest about my mental health so hopefully one day the system will change. View all posts by darie73

4 responses to “What Your Hair Stylist Wants You To Know~ From a Former Client And Hair Stylist

  • Pieces of Bipolar

    Wow! Thanks for this post Darie. Maybe you could give me some advice….? I have thick, thick, thick, curly, frizzy, long hair. I never brush it – only finger brush when wet and conditioned. I’m told to add conditioner and leave in. I can’t blow dry straight/diffuser without it going bushy. I can’t afford any of the salon products for curly hair unfortunately. Such a disappointment for me because when my hair is good I feel so much more comfortable. Instead of leaving conditioner in after washing, I add a blob of Amla oil and then Marc Anthony Strictly Curls Mousse. It works fine when my hair is wet and dries naturally. But once I sleep on it, its a dog’s breakfast. I never wear it down. I tie it in a bun all the time. People always compliment my hair when its down and moussed up so I don’t want to cut it. Do you have any ideas. Oh I also sleep on a silk pillow LOL! I’ve tried everything

    Liked by 1 person

    • darie73

      Good Lord Woman! Ok, I’m going to approach this like you didn’t just tell me all of that because it’s confusing. First it would be good to get long layer to lighten your curls and to take a small amount of frizz off the ends. When you shampoo look for a sulfate free shampoo. If you have a TJ Maxx or Marshalls near you they often sell overstock of salon products at half the price. I suggest Deva Curl products. Sometimes leaving conditioner in is only weighing your curls down so by the next day the top is flat and the rest is blah. We never used mousse we always used a spray or oil only for curls but on the top of the head you lift pieces and pin them while they dry when you remove pins and shake hair out there’s volume at the top also. Keep a spray bottle with water and a little scented oil in it you can reactivate your curls with it. I would definitely cut down on the product. Oil and mousse is why it’s good the first day only. I know you don’t want to cut it and you really don’t have to do more than a “dusting” if they don’t know what you mean by that, walk away! Flat irons are your best friend if you want straight hair and you are not a professional. Again you can salon quality at TJ Maxx and Marshalls. Ebay is good too for products it’s where I buy my all my Nars make up and Gucci Guilty Black perfume. I use a wide tooth shower comb on my hair while its wet because I’m losing some of it and the comb gets to my scalp and removes any knots. If you have trouble with anything let me know. I have my license and still go to the wholesalers sometimes. Unless you are overseas than it’s more difficult. lol People don’t understand that when we feel better about ourselves we feel better as a whole.

      Liked by 1 person

    • Pieces of Bipolar

      Thanks for the advice Darie. I’m in South Africa so we’re really behind the times here. But I’m going to take your advice and do some research on whats available. When my hair looks good I feel fantastic. But when I tie it up all frizzy and ugly, well….. I feel ugly. I really appreciate your advice! 🙂 Thanks so much xx

      Liked by 1 person

    • darie73

      I’m sure they have some good products there as long as you don’t use anything with too much alcohol in it you’ll be fine! And the less you touch your curls the better. lol

      Liked by 1 person

You must be logged in to post a comment.

%d bloggers like this: