Tag Archives: Celebrities


There’s a good reason I find myself “Following” a musician on Social Media. Through their lyrics, life stories or the topics they talk about I find that I relate to them more than other people.

Could this be because close to 70% of people in the Music Industry have a Mental Health issue and/or substance abuse problem? Personally, I think so. I can recognize myself in some of the people I’ve listened to or respected for years. I can see something in their eyes at times that I’ve seen in my own. Does this sound crazy? Probably. But I’ve voiced my suspicions about certain people that had not gone public with any problems only to find out later that I was actually correct. Two of these people I knew personally so I had a little more information than the public did years before things got to a point where the problems couldn’t be ignored anymore. No one listened to me then either.

I love it when someone only sees the words Bipolar, Alcoholic next to my name and immediately dismisses anything I say. Because anything I say must be crazy right? I love reading other people’s comments where they use the word “bipolar” as if it’s something funny. They also tend to spell it “bi-polar”. I love it when they use “bipolar” to describe the weather.

If I comment on any of this I get muted or blocked. That’s the way the game is played. In return I want to prove a point and tell them I know people in “their world” that can vouch for me. But I can’t. The funny thing is every band or musician I’ve ever met has actually liked me and has never had a problem talking to me, some for hours. Some I know through family and have been around them for years I even had to attend a wedding with one.

So I do get pissed off and defensive while on Social Media. That’s my problem not theirs. I’m also used to being ignored  and treated like I’m “less than”. This happens at the Doctors quite often and by my family. My Doctor ignored what I was telling her for so long that I almost died. She never took responsibility for ignoring my symptoms and the blood and protein that had been in my urine for over 10 years. If she had listened I might have two kidneys instead of one and not be in Stage 3/4 Chronic Kidney Disease.

I’m really tired of being mute and silenced. I’m tired of saying “I’m sorry” to everyone I know and walking on eggshells all the time. Most of all I’m just tired.

Now because I wasn’t listened to again my Urologist is worried that the stents used to keep my kidney working are badly infected and because my blood pressure is extremely low I could have the beginning of sepsis. So keep ignoring me.


There are times when you hear a song, an interview, or a radio show and hear a celebrity say something that resonates with how you feel. There’s a reason for that. There’s a reason that people who are depressed or suicidal feel the need to make contact with a famous person they’ve heard.

I’ve found myself feeling the same way at the times. You listen to them and you think “Finally someone who understands me. Someone who knows my pain, emptiness, the all consuming darkness that encompasses me at times”. I get it. I do. When you hear lyrics that describe to a T an actual moment in your life, how can you not feel that way? When you watch an interview of a person describing the same trauma and pain you’ve been through you think you have a connection.

Unfortunately, you don’t. I strongly advise you not to contact them when you are depressed or suicidal. You are opening yourself up to a world that doesn’t understand and most likely doesn’t care to understand. The person you contact is put on the spot and under the pressure of someone else’s mental health. This isn’t fair to them. Some do not react appropriately because they either don’t know how or because they have their own shit to deal with. They may make jokes or become irritated with the person contacting them. Then how does that make the depressed person feel? Not better.

This isn’t going to make me popular but at this point I don’t really care. I’m tired of everything I see and hear. I’m tired of the lack of humanity. I’m tired of the narcissism. I am tired of being dismissed and witnessing people with mental health problems actually being told to kill themselves on Social Media. I’m tired of this vile activity being viewed as acceptable. I’m tired of the lack of compassion for anyone on this planet that isn’t like you.

Dave Navarro has a radio podcast called Dark Matter. On a recent episode there was a caller who was depressed. I’m not sure anyone in the studio knew how to handle it. A person with a background in Mental Health/Depression/Suicide on hand might be a good thing when a call goes south or to help screen calls. Mr. Navarro’s documentary has opened him up to a new audience. His work with Domestic Abuse Victims has also. The documentary deals with trauma, addiction, and pain. These are all the criteria for people with mental health issues.

People also see him on TV every week making them feel as if they know him more. The unfortunate thing is the followers on the Dark Matter chat site. Some encouraged the caller to kill himself. They were also discussing previous “crazy” people that had been callers. *so you know I’m pretty sure if you added Uncle Creepy’s IQ with Renticles mine would still be higher. I hate to stoop to that level but the point needs to be made that we are not idiots*

What anyone with a Mental Health problem has to understand is that they are people like us but not. They don’t have to talk to you. You can’t guilt someone into giving you what you need. You know how badly I wanted to call in and discuss Judas Priest and Kip Winger? I was so excited because I’ve seen Priest in concert at least 6 times and I’ve seen Rob Halford when he was in the band Fight. I didn’t hear them mention that and I had met Rob Halford at that time. The band Voivod was with them and a member of the band “Piggy” liked my cousin. So glad it wasn’t me. lol I’ve also met Kip Winger and thought he was a nice guy. But the nicest guy I’ve ever met is Mike Tramp from White Lion. I was on his bus for about 4 hours discussing the movie Gladiator and Stephen King’s Dark Tower series. We even talked about how we would see it as a movie. His English isn’t perfect so that’s why it was 4 hours. I feel a connection with Mr. Navarro for the same reasons as other people. We have the same interests, we’ve met or know a lot of the same people, our sense of humor is similar, but I had to realize that it doesn’t mean anything.

This doesn’t make me worthless, ugly, or unwanted. No one else can make your problems go away no matter who they are. That’s something only you can do. I understand the need to connect and feel visible. But you won’t get it this way. What you will get is groups of ignorant people who only feel good about themselves by destroying others. Or they are trying to impress the celebrity they are following. Most of the time it isn’t appreciated but the can’t monitor everything.

I was happy to see Dark Matter issue a statement on their Facebook page. It won’t stop anything but it can’t hurt either.

Then next time anyone is feeling depressed/suicidal come here instead of contacting an actor/actress/musician. You might just find what you’re looking for.

DISCLAIMER~ I am not a Doctor I just play one online. I have lived through pretty much everything there is that life can throw at you. Including my own death from kidney failure, death of loved ones, suicide attempts, alcoholism, violence, arrests, Mental Health diagnoses, stigma, hatred, memory loss, and more. I sound awesome!national-suicide-prevention-hotline

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